December 2, 2009

Superpoop.

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Meat Market… mmmm

September 30, 2009

meat marketApparently Union Pool is the place to get laid. I feel like we already knew that. 

Frankly, I like places with lots of singles. Couples sometimes make me feel sick (I’m feeling a tad cynical at the moment, so I apologies for my negativity) Even though I’m in a relationship now (at least, I think I am?) and the following doesn’t apply to my fellow skirt intelligentsias. But quite honestly, most couples aren’t any fun to be around, they’re smug, unfriendly, and do gross things like pick food out of each other’s teeth in public.

And if you make the mistake of being the 3rd, 5th or even 9th wheel while hanging out in a group, inevitably at some point in the night you’ll find yourself alone because everyone you know is throat deep in each other’s mouths. And when this happens, you better hope you’re at a place like Union Pool -so you can easily make new friends. Otherwise, you’re on your own baby and nursing a PBR alone at the bar is very depressing.

So yes, being single can suck. But I prefer the smell of intoxicating desperation to the stench of exclusive self-righteous condescension.

"I gotta get a better job"

"I gotta get a better job"

I’m down with swearing. As long as it’s not like crazy over the top trucker-on-meth style (Not that I know any truckers on meth, but I’d assume, as a group they’re big on gratuitous swearing)

But I feel you on the chicken shit thing. I complain A LOT, but haven’t taken any real action to change my rut-like situation. Which very loosely brings me to the subject of a Mob Boss in Italy who used his pet crocodile to intimidate people and extort money from them. Being chased by a man eating croc? Now THAT’S motivation! I mean really bad-ass, old school style, light-a-fire-under-your-ass motivation.

So here’s what I’m thinking: being that I, personally, have no real marketable skills (ability to communication clearly and proficiency in Microsoft Office just doesn’t cut the mustard anymore) that being said: Grueling poverty is like the croc and going to grad school is like not getting eaten. Now, I can’t guarantee that grad school will save us from a lifetime of entry-level servitude, but it brings me to a valid question: How can I get in on a slice of the sweet reptile money extortion pie?

Studying for the GREs sucks, but i I hope this post makes you feel better.

I have to study for the GREs

September 23, 2009

Right now I’m crazy bored at work. This video totally illustrates my feels about delayed gratification. Because I have to study for the GREs but I too LOVE marshmallows

Hopefully our various random and strange stories of city life will not only be entertaining to us but to other people too, perhaps… enticing? rewarding? Eh, probably more cautionary than anything else, but whatever, we’ll hope for entertaining.  Also, we’ll try to include cool/interesting upcoming events in the NYC area, special attention paid to Brooklyn of course.